Like I was in the University of the Philippines kanina in Diliman, and I noticed that my Alma Mater is so iba na. It has changed talaga, like a total makeover! Gosh.
And I’m not talking about the bagong structures ha or the monorail that was made paandar here and there by DOST or the sunflowers that are starting to make tubo from the lupa like a stubble. No. I was referring to the tao there, the isko and iska, the UPam, the iskolar ng bayan, so to speak.
I was so gulat a while ago when I went there to get some stuffs (Yes, I like it with the letter ‘s’ sa end. It’s so sosyal to the ears.) from my former professors. It went well naman, and I was so saya to see them again. But I was flabbergasted to the extreme level of levels when I make…
Date a girl who doesn’t read. Find her in the weary squalor of a Midwestern bar. Find her in the smoke, drunken sweat, and varicolored light of an upscale nightclub. Wherever you find her, find her smiling. Make sure that it lingers when the people that are talking to her look away. Engage her with unsentimental trivialities. Use pick-up lines and laugh inwardly. Take her outside when the night overstays its welcome. Ignore the palpable weight of fatigue. Kiss her in the rain under the weak glow of a streetlamp because you’ve seen it in film. Remark at its lack of significance. Take her to your apartment. Dispatch with making love. Fuck her.
Let the anxious contract you’ve unwittingly written evolve slowly and uncomfortably into a relationship. Find shared interests and common ground like sushi, and folk music. Build an impenetrable bastion upon that ground. Make it sacred. Retreat into…
“A note, who writes a note like that? Who were you to write one to me? It boomed inside me the whole time, an explosion over and over, the joy of what you wrote to me jumpy shrapnel in my bloodstream. I can’t have it near me anymore, I’m grenading it back to you, as soon I unfold it and read it and cry one more time. Because me too, and fuck you. Even now.”
“You deserve someone who loves you with every single beat of his heart, someone who thinks about you constantly, someone who spends every minute of every day just wondering what you’re doing, where you are, who you’re with, and if you’re OK. You need someone who can help you reach your dreams and protect you from your fears. You need someone who will treat you with respect, love every part of you, especially your flaws. You should be with someone who could make you happy, really happy, dancing on air happy.”
This is my exact feels right now. 😦 I feel like I don’t belong anywhere or to anyone. And I feel so sad with that realization. I can’t even tell if there’s someone who can understand my exact feelings right now. And I’m hurt and sad all at the same time. I just wish someone can overlook and see through this facade I’m putting up around me. 😦 Why is it no one is trying to reach out to me? Why do I feel like they don’t even care? That’s why I’m feeling down today. 😦 I guess I just care so much for them but I cannot feel the same way with them. 😦
Before the year 2013 ended, I finished a book full of love poetry within just half an hour. This is new to me to read books like this because I’m not really a fan of poems. I find them hard to understand and a little bit vague that’s why I don’t really read them that much. But when I read this book by Lang Laev’s Love and Misadventure, I fell in love with it and all the poems inside it. It’s heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time. The poems inside it simply shows and expresses everything a person experiences when they fall in love. I just love it. I think whoever read this book may find a poem that he/she can relate with. 🙂
The poem below is one of my favorite poems in the book. 🙂 For those who are only in the “just friends” level with there special someone. 😦
So for those who haven’t read this book yet. You can download an epub or pdf file of this book below. Enjoy reading! 🙂